Running for the weekend

This past weekend I had a chance Saturday morning to go for a run and I took advantage of it.  It was cooler out in the mid 40s which made it take even longer for my lungs to adjust to running and my cold still didn't help.  But I did it!  My goal was to go out for 30 minutes and I did.  Did I have to walk some?  yup But who cares.  I'd say I ran somewhere between 50-75% of the time.  

I had to play mind games with myself.  The runner inside me is still there but that doesn't mean this is easy.  My legs get tired and I have to really push through it.  Making goals of getting to the next mailbox, stop sign, next block and then I can stop.  And I only allowed myself to stop a few seconds after I could tell I was warmed up.  Did I hate having to stop?  Yup.  But I just kept telling myself that interval training is the best way to get in some great cardio and burn the most calories so who cares if I gotta walk.  I did it!  It felt great and I was glad to be out there doing it.  

Here's some pictures from the weekend.  I haven't taken any front/side view shots in a while but here they are.  I'm still 7lbs higher than my lowest but I'm getting there!  

I hate my front view...I am definitely a square/rectangle shape.  Where the heck is my waist???

Side view and I'm not sucking in at all.  Not bad if you ask me.  Definitely some junk in the trunk there though!
 Don't I look gorgeous?!  That's me literally right out of bed and just pulling my hair up in a pony tail mess. 

Boom!

I didn't die....score!!!

And there you have good ole Ohio Hill Billy-ness for  you. 
Now that's some funny shit!
(get it!! hahahaha)

The Runner inside me....she's there!!!

So last night didn't go how it was supposed to AT ALL.  I got free tickets to a Dayton Dragons baseball game (local minor league) and was excited to take Miss H with me.  Told her as soon as I picked her up from the sitter and she was excited too.  Then she remembers that there is the art show at school....do a little search on the school website and it starts an hour before the game, no biggie we can do both!  

Pick up Panera for dinner (I'm OBSESSED with their roasted turkey avocado BLT) went home rush eating dinner, rushed changing and rushed out the door.  Got to the school and it's packed already.  Of course Miss H was excited to see her friends and I'm on a hunt to find her art work so we can get outta there.  Snapping a few pictures too!  Well I walked all around that darn school and could not find ONE THING done by Miss H.  Then I started noticing.....there are 600 kids in this school and there is definitely NOT 600 pictures here.  You have got to be kidding me.  Miss H goes to ask her art teacher if any of her stuff is out there...and come to find out, Miss H's stuff is in the art hallway, which is blocked off.  AWESOME!!!!!!  

So whatevs....we leave and it really looks like rain.  Check the weather and yup...it's definitely going to rain, probably as soon as we get to our seats at the ball field.  So we skip it, get some ice cream for Miss H and head home.  

Then the little voice in my head remembers my post from yesterday and about how I need to start getting outside again.  I've got to make that a habit again and so we headed out.  Miss H on her scooter and I only planned to walk, figured it would be too hard to run with my cold.  We walk for about 20 minutes and Miss H has got to pee.  

Come on kid...work with me here!!!  

So we run back home real quick and she pees and I decide to throw on a sports bra and run.  Surprisingly walking fast was too "easy" for me.  My heart rate was up but not in a I'm going to get a good work out kind of up.  I knew we didn't have much time before the rain came in and so I told Miss H we would run past the park to the stop sign and back, in total, probably around 1 mile-ish somewhere.  

And OH...M...GEEEE.   It felt SO GOOD!!!!!!!!

My lungs were burning and I was hacking up the whole time (real attractive) but my legs were there!!  I could feel my old self inside me.  I couldn't believe it.  

I seriously thought the runner inside me was a lot further away but she definitely isn't!  My lungs aren't where they were but if I felt Ok with having a cold, I know if I can become more regular again with my running, they will come back fast!!  

Yes I had to walk some but I only let myself for a few seconds maybe a minute half way through but who cares!!!  My legs felt amazing!!  

Best part of all...I was back at it with Miss H by my side and she talked to me the whole time on her scooter.  Could I talk back to her...hahaha no!  But I was listening to her and making facial expressions to what she was saying.  It was back to our special time!  

We rushed back home and it started to rain on us and it felt so good!!!  I felt strong and happy and in control again of my body.  It felt so good!!!  So last night may not have went the way it was supposed to but it definitely turned out better than I thought it would!!

Have a great weekend!!!!  I will definitely be getting in a few runs for sure!!

yes my hair is so long a pony tail is becoming a regular thing....but not after next week...it's getting chopped off!!  So over long hair!!

Have you seen my motivation???

I'm still here, my motivation has been lost for I think 2 weeks now and I just can't remember where I put it. 

It's a problem.

And then I got sick with a massive cold that is hanging on for dear life and I swear it's trying to kill me.  And now it's settled on my voice, so let me tell you I got the whole sexy voice going on.  If sexy sounds like a old man whose a smoker with a slight teenage boy feel to it....yup...I got the sexy voice going on. 

It is getting nice out and I need to get outside!!!  There is no excuse for it anymore. 

Well that's not true....I know it's going to be hard.  I know I can push through it but it's going to be hard.  My lungs will hurt afterwards, I'm going to have to walk more than I want to but oh well!!! 

SUCK IT UP SARAH!!!  <<<---- what she said!

On the good news...I'm down 3lbs in the last week!  My size 14s are fitting much better.  Amazing what 3lbs can do.  And I'm actually eating really good.  So I may be a slacker in the running department but it's all smiles and rainbows in the eating department!!!

Also good news...I signed Miss H up to be on the swim team this summer.  Good for her because she's a fish in the water and I think she's going to love it.  And BONUS for mom, there's an hour practice 3 days a week during the school year and 4 days a week during the summer.  I seriously then have no excuse to not run on those days...and I will.  I know I will!!  It'll be in a part of town where I never get to run and I love running in areas where I have never been before. 

Sorry I'm being a slacker lately....but at least I'm down 3lbs right???  :) 

You Just Can't Compare!

In the past week I have basically had the same conversation with two of my friends, my BFF and my new friend Anita.  Don't ask me why I keep calling her my new friend Anita...but I, for some reason, can't just call her Anita....she's my new friend Anita.  Odd I know!  She'll get used to it! 

So anyways, the conversation we had was about how different our bodies are.  We have all been trying to lose weight and I know for me it is absolutely weird, strange, unexplainable, and awesome all at the same time how my body has changed from years ago when I was skinnier...like 30-40lbs lighter from where I am today...and I'm wearing the same size I did then.  Yeah, right now I'm in between a 14/16.  The 14s are snug because I ate junk for 3 months and did no running at all but 16s are too loose but fit better than the 14s. 

I honestly can't remember the last time I was a size 14 but I know it was back in college.  And I was skinnier then!  How nutso is that??

Does that even make sense??? 

That's how much different my body is now.  That's how now I swear by exercise.  Pushing our body hard and sweating regularly! 

That's why I think just dieting itself isn't going to be enough, EVER.  You gotta do them both at the same time. 

Things have shifted and moved and toned etc....it's weird!  I mean how is that possible that I can wear a 14 now and 4 or 5 years ago when I was the same weight...I couldn't wear a 14?!? 

It's all because I started walking/running regularly.  I do strength training now too.  Which that in itself is pretty amazing.  You wanna make running easier??  Strength train!  This summer when I was doing the 30 Day Shred consistently and running here and there....one time at band camp...errr I mean one time while out on a run with Miss H while she was on her bike....for the first time EVER running felt EASY and it was because I had been working my legs and lifting weights.  I couldn't believe it, it almost felt like I was in someone else's body because it surely couldn't be mine! 

So I'm not really sure what the message or point even of this post is...but I guess it's to not think your body can't change significantly even if you weight doesn't as fast as you want it to.  Heck give me 20 more lbs off and I'll be in a 12 for sure and THAT hasn't happened since my early college days/senior year of high school!  

Plus don't compare yourself to someone else who you think is smaller....YOU might actually be in a smaller size then them but weigh more!  It just goes to show it's not about your numbers...it's about how YOU FEEL!!! 

So put on your best sexy face and make yourself feel good!!!!

too much???  no??  Kinda scary??  I figured!  err!!  :) 

#MomFail

So yesterday Miss H jumps in the car after I pick her up and she's all excited because she got her pictures back.

I'm immediately in panic mode...what pictures??

Miss H...you know mom...the ones you forgot about!!

opps...my bad

Didn't turn out too terrible though for us completely forgetting it was picture day. 

She may blend in with the background but at least her hair is combed and she's got a cute smile. 

RIGHT??? 

Oh well...memories people...it's all about memories!!

Also yesterday I did 2, yes TWO, workouts yesterday. 

I ran/walked while Miss H was at tumbling and then after dinner I did the 30 day shred. 

BOOM!!!

I am loving the scale this week too...I'll report on that Friday or Monday...which ever day I'm not feeling lazy!  <--- ha I'm funny!   (no you're not)

Messages from the Toliet Make my Heart Smile!!!

First things first...Miss H has been doing the cutest thing lately of grabbing my phone and taking pictures of herself or leaving me a video message.  It is the BEST surprise I get when I look back at the pictures on my phone and realize she left me a surprise.  My relationship with her has truly started to bloom lately.  I'm not sure what has happened but it's like she's finally opening up to me and talking to me about stuff and I love it!  This is something that I have always struggled to get her to do with me.  I want her to talk to me about anything and the fact that it's already forming makes my heart smile. 

Picture I found from Saturday this past weekend. 

 Her most recent video...yes she's on the toilet leaving me this message too  :)

This also happened this weekend.  Sunday morning while Miss H was at religion class I was going to head out for a walk.  Didn't plan on running just because it's still pretty painful to just walk a fast pace and I'm trying to slowly working my way back up and NOT get injured this time.  After walking a mile I was like, screw this I'm running even if I just run a block and then walk a block, I want to make this workout worth my while.  Mind you I had on a sweatshirt and my glasses on.  Obviously I wasn't planning on running!! 

It was tough but it was doable.  I was freaking hot with the sweatshirt on and we all know I don't like to be hot when I run!  Towards the end I wasn't walking at all, just running a nice slow and even pace and it felt so good!!!  I was shocked to see how many calories I burned!  And the weather was awesome.  Spring is here in Ohio and I couldn't be more happy about it.  Bring on the Spring/Summer runs!!!  I am ready!!!

1 Year Anniversary

This week marks my 1 year anniversary of my weight loss journey.  I realize towards the end of March that it was almost a year, which I can't believe, and I was sad. 

Taking a few months off from running and letting my emotions getting the best of me brought back some of my old eating habits and guess what....I gained 13 lbs! 

I can't even tell you how mad I am at myself.  I'm mad and I'm disappointed for several reasons.

I let my running get away from me and now it's a struggle to run half mile.  My shins hurt again, my feet kill me, and my lungs burn.  I forgot how much it sucked in the beginning when I started out.  I used to be able to make it all the way through Jillian Michael's level 1 of the 30 day shred without having to take a break...now I have to take a couple of 5 sec breaks to rest. 

The weight gain bothers me...but to see how weak I am right now is probably more upsetting but it's also encouraging.  I was once there and STRONG and I didn't realize how strong I was at the time but man I really was!  But I'll get there again. 

I'm back on it again and determined to do better this next year.  I'm back to counting calories and working out daily.  I am SO SORE today it kills to sit down into my chair.  Which really isn't a sit it's more like I fall into my chair I'm so sore.  ha!  But it feels good!  I feel like I'm back in control of doing something different with my body. 

And even though I may have gained some weight....I'm still A LOT better than what I was a year ago at this time.  I'm ahead of the game from a year ago and I just gotta keep going. 

That's the difference now I believe....I'm not quitting.  I'm not letting myself settle even though I did for a few months.  Just last fall I was able to run 5 miles...I can and WILL do it again.  Watch me! 

No one ever said it was going to be easy...and that's ok.  I'm not going to make this sound like it's super easy cause it's not...it takes a lot of determination and not wanting to quit. 

I am so incredibly bloated in this picture I hate this but whatever!  This dress/sweater will be the oufit I try on periodically to see how I'm doing. 

Here's to another year!!!

Sometimes Mom Duties Take Priority

I know many of you have probably been DYING to know how I did in the race on St. Patty's Day....and I'm sad to let you know...I didn't do it.

 

I ended up having to put my wants behind where Miss H needed to be that day and so I skipped out.  Which I'll be honest...wasn't all that bad considering it was a chilly 34 degrees and breezy out! 

 

But I did get my tshirt from that day (whole point of paying for a race anyways right??  Can I get an AMEN??) 

 

*crickets*

 

hello??

 

Anyone there??

 

Moving on! 

 

I'm getting back at it though.  Trying to get my eating under control again and drinking my weight in water each day.  This weekend its supposed to be in the 40s...so I'm going to get back out there and start up again. 

 

Love this little girl!

 

 

 

First "Race" of 2013..kinda

Anyone else running in a St. Patty's Day Race? 

I'm "running" a 4 miler but there ain't gonna be no racin' going on around here for me! 

After yesterday's trial run...I'll be surprised if I can run 3 miles without walking. 

I fully plan on walking some of it (and drinking green beer at the same time) and supporting my fellow runners as I eat drink their green beer their dust. 

My co-worker talked me into doing and I'm now regretting it and throwing office supplies at him during all working hours because I know I'm not going to do well but Whatev right?? 

It's the start of the running season and there's FREE GREEN BEER afterwards....and of course

I get a tshirt for participating. 

It's ALL about the tshirt..duh! And the green beer...

They didn't say how much you gotta participate...but I'll be participating in some shape that day.

Does picking up my registration packet = participating?? 

One thing this "race" will do is kick my butt back in gear and get me back out there again. 

Should be fun....with all that green beer. 



Weekend Recap....I'm back at it and SORE!

This weekend was relaxing and crazy busy too at the same time.  Come Friday afternoon I was D.O.N.E with the week! 

After sporting this cute scarf all day

LOVE infinity scarfs right now and I FINALLY found one I love (NY and CO)

 I enjoyed a couple of these after I got home for the day while I made dinner and cleaned my house.  I rarely drink just because so when you see me doing this...you know it's been a LONG week!

Saturday I spent the entire day cleaning more and making food for family to come over for Miss H's birthday party.  It was a great time but just crazy I tell ya.  That kind of fun is exhausting! 

Fruit Pizza Idea I found on Pinterest...pretty close to the actual one I must say!!



Pretty good right??



All the yummy food I made.  No complaining from any of the guests how good everything was!

All ready for the party!

Love this sweater!!  I need 5 more like it

Ice Cream cake from the DQ

Cousins!  Seeing these 3 together warms my heart in ways I never thought possible

Then Sunday morning Miss H was dropped off at religion class at 9am and it was a nice day out and I decided I needed to get my butt out there and run again. 

It was in the 50s when I woke up...so perfect weather to head out in. 

I'll be honest...I've been scared of seeing how much I've lost what I worked so hard to do this past year in the couple of months I've taken off from running.  I knew it was gonna be bad and I knew my mind was gonna tell me I couldn't do it.  I headed out and did .7 miles and I was huffing and puffing like the big bad wolf in the Three Little Pigs story. 

I got to a stop light and couldn't believe how much my lungs hurt.  My legs were out of shape you could tell but OMG my lungs...where did they go??? 

I haven't had to concentrate this hard on keeping my breathing under control in so long....IT SUCKED!! 

I walked some and stretched on my legs and feet good...they were hurting and I could feel myself starting to limp.  The LAST thing I want is to get hurt again.  I gotta take better care of my feet and make sure I stretch out.  Got to another light and I started running again....felt a little better but it was still rough and then of course I hit a hill.  ERRR!

I made myself get to the top of the hill before I stop, caught my breathe again and started up again, run another long stretch and then walk again.  Started running again and FINALLY felt good and finished out the last half mile or so strong and ran the rest of the way.  I was tired and exhausted and couldn't believe how much that 2.7 miles sucked. 

It took me 35 miles to do that 2.7 miles.  yes I walked some so it would  have been faster if I ran...but I ran 5 miles in 55 minutes on Thanksgiving day...not cool!

I was mad at myself that I didn't keep up with my running but then I know it's really not been possible with it being cold out.  80% of my running has always taken place with Miss H out with me and I can't drag my kid out in the cold to run a couple of miles...I'm not THAT mean!  So it is what it is...I'm running further than I was a year ago at this time so I'll take it. 

Walking around my church parking lot and just stretching it out and reflecting on everything going on in my life I spotted an outdoor rosary area and the stations of the cross and I walked through them all and prayed the rosary in this area while I waited for Miss H to get out of class. 

Outdoor Rosary

It was one of the more peaceful things I have done in a long time.  The wind was blowing, the sun was shining through the branches and it was just me out there.  And it reminded me that sometimes in life things get crazy and busy and overwhelming and they don't always go the way we thought they would...but no matter what the basics of our life are always there. 

My faith is a true basic in my life.  I can't remember the last time I prayed the rosary but doing so felt very healing with everything I've been going through these last couple of months.  It reminded that I don't run for races or fast times...I run for me.  I run for that peaceful feeling I get being out on my own, just my thoughts and my feet on the ground. 

This morning I woke up crazy sore but I'm glad to be back at it. 

Bring on the Spring Running Season!

Can I Be.....a Morning Person???

Hi I'm Sarah....I am a Snooze-aholic, I have slept in ALL week and skipped every single one of my workouts.

All together now.... Welcome Sarah!

I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON!!!!!  

Never have been...I wait until the last second I need to get up and then rush around to get us ready and out the door.  

And I hate it!  

I would LOVE to be one of those mom's that rises before her children and has had breakfast and has time to sit down on the couch and drink some coffee and watch the news in the morning.  

Seriously you women who can do this....even though I don't understand you...I'm jealous you can do that!  

I'm kind of weird about it too...because I CAN get up early if I have to.  Remember this summer I was getting up at 4:30am! to run with my BFF or sister...I did it.  It's like knowing that someone was going to be at my door soon had me jump out of bed.  

Not sure how feasible that is to have someone come show up at my door every morning at 5am.  

Even on the weekends...I rarely sleep in.  Honestly!  The sun is up and I'm up even if I went to bed at after midnight I'm up for the day.  But why during the week can't I do it??  

 

 For example...last night I was in bed at 8pm.  Honestly, I was exhausted after Miss H went to bed, and I put a movie on in bed (I know bad habit there) and I only remember seeing the first 15 minutes of the movie and then I was out....so I'd say I was for sure out by 8:30pm...so one would think it would be no problem to get up at 5am to go to the gym.  

ERRR!  WRONG!  

I hit the snooze button all the way until 6:15am.  

wow did I just admit that...that's kind of embarrassing

And I'm being honest here...I really want to be a morning person.  I know that when I get up earlier it just makes  my day feel so much better.  I'm in control of the day and setting my family up for the best way possible for them to also have a great day.  At least that's what I envision instead of me yelling for Miss H to hurry up and get dressed cause we GOTTA GO SISTA!  

I mean I honestly would LOVE to be able to make my daughter a hot breakfast in the morning....there are so many reasons why I should get up out of bed in the morning!  

This morning I got to work and opened my good friend...Mr Google.  And this is the article I found...

  How to Become a Morning Person  

According to this article, I need to find my normal internal clock and I need to reset my internal clock.  

1. I need to plan to get 8 hours of sleep a night, so if I want up at 4:30-5am to run in the morning, that means bedtime at 8:30-9pm.  WOW, that's a lot different than I do now, going to bed at 10pm was doing good I thought.  

2. Need to have a regular schedule, no sleeping in on the weekends, it's gotta be consistent every day...ok I'd agree with that.  

3. Create a relaxing sleeping atmosphere:  Start preparing for bed 30 minutes before hand. 

           1. Take a hot bath (won't argue there!)

           2. Jot down things on mind in a diary/journal

           3. Meditate on relaxing your body (if you say so)

4. Put your alarm clock away from your bedside so you actually have to get up out of bed to turn it off.  hmmm...I've been known to climb right back bed...

5.  Get outside of the house within 10 minutes of waking up....I agree this works because by the time I get to the gym I feel great already.  

Sounds like a good plan...and I WANT to be a morning person.  Just going to take some adjusting to but I can do it right???  

Any suggestions to give me from you awesome morning people???  

Wish me luck!!

 

Being mad...makes a great workout!

This week, since Monday I have been to the gym 3 times so far.  I've been battling a cold and it just seems like I can't get enough sleep.  Going to bed at 8:30-9pm it should be easy for me to get up at 5am but it has not been.  I've still been going though and I've never regretted it yet or gotten home and wished I would have just stayed in bed.  

Last night I went there while Miss H was at her dad's for a couple of hours.  I really don't like going at night, it's packed right now and it's just full of men lifting crazy amounts of weight and I get all kinds of stares when I walk in, but last night I was mad.  Just a frustrating day all around and I wanted to punch something.  If they had a punching bag I probably would have went crazy on it!  

They don't so I started out on the treadmill....did 15 minutes (little over a mile) and then lifted weights for 15 minutes (legs and arms).  Man lifting weight is a great way to handle energy when your mad!  My muscles were shaking after just 15 minutes.  

Decided to try on the bike last night for the first time ever.  It was boring and resulted in me taking pictures.  

Bike...blurry cause I was pedaling as I was doing this...rode 5 miles

the men behind me working out..so serious

After I finished the bike I did another round of lifting weights and called it a night.  I was still mad and frustrated so what do you do in an instance like that???

You stop at your BFF's house and vent to her.  Works like a charm every time!!!  

Have a great weekend everyone!!

New Finds!

The Green Monster

 This new baby is pretty amazing and great for recovery after a great workout.  I found this on pinterest, which there is a lot of great protein shake/smooth ideas on that addicting website.  

The Green Monster

1 large handful of spinach

1/2 frozen banana

1/2 cup frozen mango

1 scoop Whey Protein vanilla flavor

1 cup Almond Vanilla milk

1 tsp sugar

3-4 ice cubes

So yummy and very filling!  

Another new thing I've heard about is Super Feet insoles for your shoes. 

Last Thursday night I went to my local running store, Up and Running for you local peeps, and asked about them.  They definitely recommended them and had me try on the green and berry ones to see which was better.  The green ones were exactly what I needed.  They fit them perfectly to fit in my shoes and off I went.  

Another reason to find a local running store to check out.  Yes they tend to be more expensive but just getting to know the people that work there can be so beneficial for you!  They are there not just to sell you something but they actually are runners themselves and can help answer any of your questions.  

These have made a huge difference with my feet and helping with my PF.  I can tell I have support right where I need it!  Heavenly I tell ya!!  

Nothings better than finding new running gear to help you out or food to help you recover so you can do it all over again tomorrow!  

The Gym - What are we afraid of??

As I mentioned last week, I joined a gym.  And it honestly feels great to being back to working out.  Not only am I running on the treadmill but I'm also lifting weights...my arms are crying right now from this mornings work out.  

This gym is what I used to think as a such an intimidating place to go.  I live in a smaller city so there are not a lot of options and I didn't want to spend a bunch of money so my options were even less.  This isn't a "Girls Only Gym", it's more of a guys gym with a few females I've seen.  I've gone there four times now and of those times I've only seen only 2 other girls working out there.  Most of the time I walk in and it's all guys...ugh right??  I mean I am not the most in-shape looking person, so I can only imagine what these guys must be thinking when I walk in the gym.  This is where I realize that things have changed for me. 

I used to care what those thoughts were what other people had of me when I walked into a gym or when I would attempt to run outside years ago.  Now...I honestly don't care.  That doesn't mean that there isn't a split second where my mind makes me want to turn around and wait until there is no one else there...ha!...but instead I just walk in and do my thing.  I may not be body building like 90% of the guys in there...but I belong there.  

It's kinda like the question I'm constantly asking myself....is this what's best for me to be the best mom for Miss H?  This questions keeps me from making bad food choices, it's what makes me walk into those gym doors...my pride isn't going to get in the way!

This past Saturday I walked into the gym full of men already working out at 9am.  WTH???  Don't these people sleep in??  I stretched and jumped on a treadmill and busted out 2 miles, did some weights and then did another mile.  I couldn't believe how good I felt running.  It hasn't felt good in a long time and I was so excited to see myself being able to run further than 1.5 miles!  

Not that fast, but it's better than nothing...and I'll take that anytime!

And dang it felt amazing being able to do that in front of all those guys at the gym Saturday morning.  I'm sure they probably weren't paying attention at all or could have cared less about what I was doing, but it was a confidence booster to be able to walk into a gym and do my thing and show them that I'm not just a girl who is on a new year high and will die out after a few weeks...I've been doing this!!! 

Getting up at 5am sucks...it's hard but I've been doing it.  Maybe this will make me a morning person???  ha!  Let's not get carried away now!

Wishful thinking never hurt anyone right??

Holiday Break Photo Dump

Finally back to our normal routine this week and it's been rough getting used to getting up before the sun is up again.  I was off work between Christmas and New Years and couldn't have enjoyed it anymore.  We were lazy, we played games and ate too much, played outside in the snow, built snowmen and opened way too many presents.  It was a great Christmas this year.  It was different having another whole side of the family to go to and celebrate with but each time I get together with Tony's family, I love them more and more each time.  They just fit perfectly into our lives and we seem to fit pretty well into theirs as well.  It kind of feels like they've always been there, as cliche as that sounds. 

I also realized over break that I have to bite the bullet and just join a freaking gym already.  Can I afford it, not really, but should I?  Yeah!  I have gained the holiday 5lbs and it makes me sick and mad at myself. 

I have not only fallen off the bandwagon but I can't even see the dust of the waggon leaving me behind.  I am disappointed in myself.  I went back to my old ways and they clearly don't work.  I stopped looking at food as fuel for my body and as an emotional way for numerous reasons.  That is not me or who I want to be.  It just isn't.  Plus I'm getting married in a 11 months and I don't want that day to come and for me to regret how I look.  I want to look and feel amazing on that day and so I need to join a gym to get myself back on track. 

Working out makes me think better about my food choices.  It makes me happier.  It makes me feel strong and good about myself.  And I miss feeling physically tired from a good work out. 

Hardest part is going to be getting up at 5am through the week so I can be at the gym between 5:15-5:30am and back home by 6:30.  I am not a morning person....this is going to be a challenge but I am going to do it even if I have to set 10 alarms all around my house to get me up! 

More on the gym later...but for now...here's a massive photo dump from pictures I took over Christmas Break. 

Attempt #1 at getting a cousins picture....Miss H has to control these boys somehow...

About as good as it gets peeps! 

My crazy godchild....love that crazy kid

And then we got dumped on...and I realized how weak I really am in my arms by shoveling this junk!

it just kept coming! 

Miss H got her first American Girl Doll

Lots of games played!

playing in the endless amounts of snow

Miss H "helping" me one day at work for a few hours

Overall it was a great break and I'm sad to see it go. 

Come back tomorrow for more on the gym experience!