Mother's Day

I had the best Mother's Day Ever this year and probably the best yet.  One of the bonuses of Miss H getting older is she can do stuff on her own a little and she is amazing at doing things for special days.  Gets that for her mama!!!  

Being a single parent, holidays like Mother's Day don't really do much for me because it doesn't mean much when you gotta go buy your own gift and card and so on.  What's the point, it's just another day where you gotta do everything....yay me right??  

Well not this year.  Sunday morning I kind of was slowly waking up because the sun was up but was wanting to refuse it was actually time to get up.  Then I heard Miss H get up and she went right into the kitchen and I could hear her doing stuff in there.  Figured she woke up hungry and was going to put some cartoons on or something.  Next thing I know she's in my room and sets a plate on my stomach.  I open my eyes and I see her and the best breakfast in bed I have ever had. 

Doesn't get any better than that right there!!

 Then I opened my gifts and I just cried.  The poems that were included and the pictures she drew were amazing and just touched my heart in a way I didn't know a homemade gift could.  Hearing Miss H tell me thank you for being her mommy when I'm just thankful God let me be her mommy.  Just an amazing feeling and feeling my heart become so full with love and a joy and remembering why I do everything that I do is because of her.  

Love this picture she drew of us

Love that little girl more than anything!

Seriously the best Mother's Day I have had yet! 

 

Running for the weekend

This past weekend I had a chance Saturday morning to go for a run and I took advantage of it.  It was cooler out in the mid 40s which made it take even longer for my lungs to adjust to running and my cold still didn't help.  But I did it!  My goal was to go out for 30 minutes and I did.  Did I have to walk some?  yup But who cares.  I'd say I ran somewhere between 50-75% of the time.  

I had to play mind games with myself.  The runner inside me is still there but that doesn't mean this is easy.  My legs get tired and I have to really push through it.  Making goals of getting to the next mailbox, stop sign, next block and then I can stop.  And I only allowed myself to stop a few seconds after I could tell I was warmed up.  Did I hate having to stop?  Yup.  But I just kept telling myself that interval training is the best way to get in some great cardio and burn the most calories so who cares if I gotta walk.  I did it!  It felt great and I was glad to be out there doing it.  

Here's some pictures from the weekend.  I haven't taken any front/side view shots in a while but here they are.  I'm still 7lbs higher than my lowest but I'm getting there!  

I hate my front view...I am definitely a square/rectangle shape.  Where the heck is my waist???

Side view and I'm not sucking in at all.  Not bad if you ask me.  Definitely some junk in the trunk there though!
 Don't I look gorgeous?!  That's me literally right out of bed and just pulling my hair up in a pony tail mess. 

Boom!

I didn't die....score!!!

And there you have good ole Ohio Hill Billy-ness for  you. 
Now that's some funny shit!
(get it!! hahahaha)

Happy Mother's Day!!!

 Happy Mother's Day to all you Mommy's out there!!!!  

Hope you have a great day celebrating and enjoying the awesome job you do as a mother!!!

You agree???

 And something to remember....

Putting yourself first sometimes....really isn't always that bad!  Your actions speak louder than any words!!

Happy Mother's Day!!!

The Runner inside me....she's there!!!

So last night didn't go how it was supposed to AT ALL.  I got free tickets to a Dayton Dragons baseball game (local minor league) and was excited to take Miss H with me.  Told her as soon as I picked her up from the sitter and she was excited too.  Then she remembers that there is the art show at school....do a little search on the school website and it starts an hour before the game, no biggie we can do both!  

Pick up Panera for dinner (I'm OBSESSED with their roasted turkey avocado BLT) went home rush eating dinner, rushed changing and rushed out the door.  Got to the school and it's packed already.  Of course Miss H was excited to see her friends and I'm on a hunt to find her art work so we can get outta there.  Snapping a few pictures too!  Well I walked all around that darn school and could not find ONE THING done by Miss H.  Then I started noticing.....there are 600 kids in this school and there is definitely NOT 600 pictures here.  You have got to be kidding me.  Miss H goes to ask her art teacher if any of her stuff is out there...and come to find out, Miss H's stuff is in the art hallway, which is blocked off.  AWESOME!!!!!!  

So whatevs....we leave and it really looks like rain.  Check the weather and yup...it's definitely going to rain, probably as soon as we get to our seats at the ball field.  So we skip it, get some ice cream for Miss H and head home.  

Then the little voice in my head remembers my post from yesterday and about how I need to start getting outside again.  I've got to make that a habit again and so we headed out.  Miss H on her scooter and I only planned to walk, figured it would be too hard to run with my cold.  We walk for about 20 minutes and Miss H has got to pee.  

Come on kid...work with me here!!!  

So we run back home real quick and she pees and I decide to throw on a sports bra and run.  Surprisingly walking fast was too "easy" for me.  My heart rate was up but not in a I'm going to get a good work out kind of up.  I knew we didn't have much time before the rain came in and so I told Miss H we would run past the park to the stop sign and back, in total, probably around 1 mile-ish somewhere.  

And OH...M...GEEEE.   It felt SO GOOD!!!!!!!!

My lungs were burning and I was hacking up the whole time (real attractive) but my legs were there!!  I could feel my old self inside me.  I couldn't believe it.  

I seriously thought the runner inside me was a lot further away but she definitely isn't!  My lungs aren't where they were but if I felt Ok with having a cold, I know if I can become more regular again with my running, they will come back fast!!  

Yes I had to walk some but I only let myself for a few seconds maybe a minute half way through but who cares!!!  My legs felt amazing!!  

Best part of all...I was back at it with Miss H by my side and she talked to me the whole time on her scooter.  Could I talk back to her...hahaha no!  But I was listening to her and making facial expressions to what she was saying.  It was back to our special time!  

We rushed back home and it started to rain on us and it felt so good!!!  I felt strong and happy and in control again of my body.  It felt so good!!!  So last night may not have went the way it was supposed to but it definitely turned out better than I thought it would!!

Have a great weekend!!!!  I will definitely be getting in a few runs for sure!!

yes my hair is so long a pony tail is becoming a regular thing....but not after next week...it's getting chopped off!!  So over long hair!!

Have you seen my motivation???

I'm still here, my motivation has been lost for I think 2 weeks now and I just can't remember where I put it. 

It's a problem.

And then I got sick with a massive cold that is hanging on for dear life and I swear it's trying to kill me.  And now it's settled on my voice, so let me tell you I got the whole sexy voice going on.  If sexy sounds like a old man whose a smoker with a slight teenage boy feel to it....yup...I got the sexy voice going on. 

It is getting nice out and I need to get outside!!!  There is no excuse for it anymore. 

Well that's not true....I know it's going to be hard.  I know I can push through it but it's going to be hard.  My lungs will hurt afterwards, I'm going to have to walk more than I want to but oh well!!! 

SUCK IT UP SARAH!!!  <<<---- what she said!

On the good news...I'm down 3lbs in the last week!  My size 14s are fitting much better.  Amazing what 3lbs can do.  And I'm actually eating really good.  So I may be a slacker in the running department but it's all smiles and rainbows in the eating department!!!

Also good news...I signed Miss H up to be on the swim team this summer.  Good for her because she's a fish in the water and I think she's going to love it.  And BONUS for mom, there's an hour practice 3 days a week during the school year and 4 days a week during the summer.  I seriously then have no excuse to not run on those days...and I will.  I know I will!!  It'll be in a part of town where I never get to run and I love running in areas where I have never been before. 

Sorry I'm being a slacker lately....but at least I'm down 3lbs right???  :) 

A Letter to my Twenties

Dear Twenty Something Sarah,

Happy 20th Birthday Sarah!  You are a freshman in college and have just completed your first year.  You are slowly but surely coming out of your shell and becoming ok with who you are and soon you'll realize that people will actually love and enjoy being around the true Sarah.  Enjoy it! 

Happy 21st Birthday Sarah!  I am slightly disappointed in how you celebrated your 21st birthday.  You didn't get drunk!!  No keg parties, no keg stands....just a few college friends, your BFF and dinner and your first legal beer at BW3s a block from college.  Girl you need to lighten up!  Stop worrying about what people think of you and BE YOU!!!  You don't always have to be so mature and put together.  It is ok to mess up and make mistakes!!!  Eventually during this year you will be a guy who you think is amazing and can't believe that you may have actually met "the one".  Girlfriend...you need to learn to stand up for yourself.  NO MAN is ever worth putting yourself second before him.  YOU are Worth GOLD Sarah!!  Believe in yourself and have confidence in who you are, don't you let anyone put out the light that is inside your smile. 

Happy 22nd Birthday Sarah!!  Girlfriend you are in for a rough year, put your big girl panties on and get ready.  You are going to become a mom in this next year.  Yeah, that's big and it's going to scare you to death and you have no idea how  you are going to do it but somehow that strength that you have inside of you starts to slowly show up because you handle a lot in this year.  Being an unwed mom is not fun, the stares, the questions, being left out of college parties, your boyfriend doesn't take a ton of interest in how any of this effects you but he's trying.  You will doubt your self worth more than anything during this next year and I am so sorry about this but I promise you will get through it.  You will be called some horrible things but you'll be surprised by those that stand beside you and give you a hug and say it'll be ok.  Don't let those that put you down put out the light inside you, fight for it every day because you have a little girl who will depend on that light!  Yes you are having a girl, not a boy named Alex like you swore you would! 

Happy 23rd Birthday Sarah!! This is another hard birthday.  Reality just keeps hitting you in the face and you realize on this birthday you will give up a lot because you are a mom at such a young age.  This is the night that you should be out bar-hopping with all your college friends getting crazy and celebrating your Senior Year at UD.  Instead you sit and rock your baby girl as you cry about the road you see your life heading down.  You've always grown up too fast and you are still doing that.  It's ok to cry about this.  It's hard I know, you now have diapers and feeding schedules and how to teach Miss H to eat cereal when your friends are going to happy hours and dates and living the life outside of college.  This is another rough year for you but once again you make it through.  You are strong and remember that!!!  Stand up for yourself and when you can't, look at your baby girl.  She WILL give you the strength that you need to leave her daddy and go down another path of being a young single parent.  You will once again become embarrassed by certain events, but those events will make you stand up for yourself and cut ties with people that it should have happened a long time ago.  These moments really open up that fire inside of you to fight for what is right and the future you know you can give your daughter.  Just remember you WILL be ok!!

Happy 24th and 25th Birthday Sarah!!  Girl I hate to tell you but these are going to be the years you practically have tears stained on your face every weekend.  You move out on your own with Miss H and you promise yourself that you will not date anyone until you know you don't need a man to be happy.  It takes you a long time, about a good year and a half until you know you are ready.  Along this time you struggle with what else comes with being a single parent and that is visitation with the other parent and being separated from your baby girl and having to learn to let go of control and just pray that God will take care of her and keep her safe while she is away from you.  However, you meet an amazing man this year, who will teach you a lot about respecting yourself and he will become a friend for life even after you guys decide it isn't going to work.  Miss H will adore him forever and he will keep his promise of being a great example in her life. 

Happy 26th Birthday Sarah!!!  Congrats you have just been laid off from work after a long hard tax season.  You once again cry yourself to sleep so many nights scared to death how you are going to make it.  But fortunately, God really shows up this year and things start to look up.  You find a new job where you are appreciated and you learn to enjoy the small things with your daughter again and stop resenting the hard times.  You teach yourself what it means to dance in your bedroom singing with a hairbrush.  Oh and by the way...you are becoming an awesome mom!  You are so good at creating memories with Miss H and I promise she will remember them even when she is 7 years old.  Your daughter is strong because you show her how to be.  You fight for her and she may not realize it but just a few years down the road, she knows mom is on her team! 

Happy 27th - 29th Birthday Sarah!!!  You have really found Sarah inside.  Strangers now get to see the real Sarah, not the shy quiet and reserved one.  You are fooling no one anymore, they all know your giggle and appreciate your smile.  Your opinion is looked upon from others and you have no idea why.  But continue to fight for the real Sarah to shine!  It will bring some amazing new friends into your life and those will be the friends that will be there for you no matter what.  You have also become a true soccer mom!  You coach soccer one year even though you have no idea what you are doing but you enjoy it!  You are involved in Miss H's school and you know her teachers well and they know you.  You will be shocked at some of the things that people say and do to you at times, but move on.  It's not worth your time or energy...you are stronger and you know what is right in your heart...listen to that!  Also....you'll be shocked to know this...but you become a runner in your 29th year!!  Yes!!! It is so exciting and you can't believe what you can do!!!  I told you that the light inside of you was stronger than you knew and your heart is stronger than it leads on.  You also will have to make some tough decisions this year but you do it with grace and maturity.  You have definitely learned that you are worth more than to settle for things in life  You also experience becoming an Aunt not once but three times during these years.  Those little boys have a huge part in  your heart and you're amazed at how much you can love your sister's children.  Please, remember this one thing and never forget it because you often don't give yourself any credit for it.....YOU are one AMAZING MOM!!!!  You try harder than anyone and the stress you put on yourself is crazy but it pays off.  How so???  You'll see it in Miss H...just wait and see, you'll know when you can tell that your hard work is starting to show through her. 

Happy 30th Birthday Sarah!! 
Here we are about to turn 30 years old and we have accomplished a lot!  Girl you have been through hell and back and sometimes back again.  You have made a lot of mistakes along the way, you've had self doubt and had to fight through the consequences of that but we know there is light at the end of the tunnel.  You have the best daughter anyone could ever ask for who makes your heart smile in ways you didn't know it could.  Also, your best friend from 8th grade is still standing with you!  She is definitely your sister from another mother.  Let go of your 20s Sarah and move on to the 30s, you've made it this far and God only knows what they will bring but you KNOW you can handle it!!!  Be yourself, love yourself enough to stand up for you, and pray constantly!!!! 

Happy 30th Birthday to myself!!!! 

I can't believe I'm here, but let's go!!!! 

Life is about the journey with the little moments that shape who we become along the way and learning to enjoy every day we are blessed with and knowing that it's happened for a reason! 

 

You Just Can't Compare!

In the past week I have basically had the same conversation with two of my friends, my BFF and my new friend Anita.  Don't ask me why I keep calling her my new friend Anita...but I, for some reason, can't just call her Anita....she's my new friend Anita.  Odd I know!  She'll get used to it! 

So anyways, the conversation we had was about how different our bodies are.  We have all been trying to lose weight and I know for me it is absolutely weird, strange, unexplainable, and awesome all at the same time how my body has changed from years ago when I was skinnier...like 30-40lbs lighter from where I am today...and I'm wearing the same size I did then.  Yeah, right now I'm in between a 14/16.  The 14s are snug because I ate junk for 3 months and did no running at all but 16s are too loose but fit better than the 14s. 

I honestly can't remember the last time I was a size 14 but I know it was back in college.  And I was skinnier then!  How nutso is that??

Does that even make sense??? 

That's how much different my body is now.  That's how now I swear by exercise.  Pushing our body hard and sweating regularly! 

That's why I think just dieting itself isn't going to be enough, EVER.  You gotta do them both at the same time. 

Things have shifted and moved and toned etc....it's weird!  I mean how is that possible that I can wear a 14 now and 4 or 5 years ago when I was the same weight...I couldn't wear a 14?!? 

It's all because I started walking/running regularly.  I do strength training now too.  Which that in itself is pretty amazing.  You wanna make running easier??  Strength train!  This summer when I was doing the 30 Day Shred consistently and running here and there....one time at band camp...errr I mean one time while out on a run with Miss H while she was on her bike....for the first time EVER running felt EASY and it was because I had been working my legs and lifting weights.  I couldn't believe it, it almost felt like I was in someone else's body because it surely couldn't be mine! 

So I'm not really sure what the message or point even of this post is...but I guess it's to not think your body can't change significantly even if you weight doesn't as fast as you want it to.  Heck give me 20 more lbs off and I'll be in a 12 for sure and THAT hasn't happened since my early college days/senior year of high school!  

Plus don't compare yourself to someone else who you think is smaller....YOU might actually be in a smaller size then them but weigh more!  It just goes to show it's not about your numbers...it's about how YOU FEEL!!! 

So put on your best sexy face and make yourself feel good!!!!

too much???  no??  Kinda scary??  I figured!  err!!  :) 

#MomFail

So yesterday Miss H jumps in the car after I pick her up and she's all excited because she got her pictures back.

I'm immediately in panic mode...what pictures??

Miss H...you know mom...the ones you forgot about!!

opps...my bad

Didn't turn out too terrible though for us completely forgetting it was picture day. 

She may blend in with the background but at least her hair is combed and she's got a cute smile. 

RIGHT??? 

Oh well...memories people...it's all about memories!!

Also yesterday I did 2, yes TWO, workouts yesterday. 

I ran/walked while Miss H was at tumbling and then after dinner I did the 30 day shred. 

BOOM!!!

I am loving the scale this week too...I'll report on that Friday or Monday...which ever day I'm not feeling lazy!  <--- ha I'm funny!   (no you're not)

Messages from the Toliet Make my Heart Smile!!!

First things first...Miss H has been doing the cutest thing lately of grabbing my phone and taking pictures of herself or leaving me a video message.  It is the BEST surprise I get when I look back at the pictures on my phone and realize she left me a surprise.  My relationship with her has truly started to bloom lately.  I'm not sure what has happened but it's like she's finally opening up to me and talking to me about stuff and I love it!  This is something that I have always struggled to get her to do with me.  I want her to talk to me about anything and the fact that it's already forming makes my heart smile. 

Picture I found from Saturday this past weekend. 

 Her most recent video...yes she's on the toilet leaving me this message too  :)

This also happened this weekend.  Sunday morning while Miss H was at religion class I was going to head out for a walk.  Didn't plan on running just because it's still pretty painful to just walk a fast pace and I'm trying to slowly working my way back up and NOT get injured this time.  After walking a mile I was like, screw this I'm running even if I just run a block and then walk a block, I want to make this workout worth my while.  Mind you I had on a sweatshirt and my glasses on.  Obviously I wasn't planning on running!! 

It was tough but it was doable.  I was freaking hot with the sweatshirt on and we all know I don't like to be hot when I run!  Towards the end I wasn't walking at all, just running a nice slow and even pace and it felt so good!!!  I was shocked to see how many calories I burned!  And the weather was awesome.  Spring is here in Ohio and I couldn't be more happy about it.  Bring on the Spring/Summer runs!!!  I am ready!!!

30th Birthday Cake *Challenge*

So....my 30th birthday is coming up towards the end of this month. 

Am I freaking out about turning the big 3-0??

Hell to the NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

I honestly can't wait to turn 30. 

Call me crazy. 

*YOU'RE CRAZY!*

ouch

In all seriousness, I'm serious when I say I'm seriously ready to turn 30...seriously!

hahaha  did that get on your nerves?? 

*like seriously*

FOCUS SARAH FOCUS!

I cannot wait to turn 30.  My 20s have pretty much sucked, I've gotten my monies worth out of them and it's time to say SIANARA!  (<--- is that how you spell that??)

I'll write about that in another post but my BFF texted me early this morning with a new idea!

And I'm allll about it. 

One thing me and my BFF share, is our love for cake!  So it's perfect for us. 

Put cake in front of us and tell us what we gotta do to get it and you bet we are gonna do it! 

So bring on the cake challenge!!!!!

Phone Dump

Here's the latest and greatest photos from my phone lately...enjoy!

Fruit Pizza....I used to be afraid to make this (why I don't know) and now I make it all the time. 

My loves. 
That little guy is the stingiest littl man with his kisses but every now and then I get lucky and he blesses his Aunt Sarah with a big ole' wet one! 

Love my scarf I bought a month or so ago...it screams spring to me!

healthy snack...getting back at it!

1 Year Anniversary

This week marks my 1 year anniversary of my weight loss journey.  I realize towards the end of March that it was almost a year, which I can't believe, and I was sad. 

Taking a few months off from running and letting my emotions getting the best of me brought back some of my old eating habits and guess what....I gained 13 lbs! 

I can't even tell you how mad I am at myself.  I'm mad and I'm disappointed for several reasons.

I let my running get away from me and now it's a struggle to run half mile.  My shins hurt again, my feet kill me, and my lungs burn.  I forgot how much it sucked in the beginning when I started out.  I used to be able to make it all the way through Jillian Michael's level 1 of the 30 day shred without having to take a break...now I have to take a couple of 5 sec breaks to rest. 

The weight gain bothers me...but to see how weak I am right now is probably more upsetting but it's also encouraging.  I was once there and STRONG and I didn't realize how strong I was at the time but man I really was!  But I'll get there again. 

I'm back on it again and determined to do better this next year.  I'm back to counting calories and working out daily.  I am SO SORE today it kills to sit down into my chair.  Which really isn't a sit it's more like I fall into my chair I'm so sore.  ha!  But it feels good!  I feel like I'm back in control of doing something different with my body. 

And even though I may have gained some weight....I'm still A LOT better than what I was a year ago at this time.  I'm ahead of the game from a year ago and I just gotta keep going. 

That's the difference now I believe....I'm not quitting.  I'm not letting myself settle even though I did for a few months.  Just last fall I was able to run 5 miles...I can and WILL do it again.  Watch me! 

No one ever said it was going to be easy...and that's ok.  I'm not going to make this sound like it's super easy cause it's not...it takes a lot of determination and not wanting to quit. 

I am so incredibly bloated in this picture I hate this but whatever!  This dress/sweater will be the oufit I try on periodically to see how I'm doing. 

Here's to another year!!!

Taco Casserole

Taco Casserole

Part of eating healthy again is trying to make healthy meals at home.  This is one that I saw on Facebook and thought I would try it.  And it was GOOD and it's good even the next day!

1 bag of doritos

1 lb. lean hamburger

1 package taco seasoning

1 package mozzerella cheese low fat

1 package chedder cheese low fat

lettuce and tomatos

Cook the hamburger and mix in the taco seasoning as instructed on package. 

Layer in 9 x 13 pan as:

Doritos on bottom

Meat/taco seasoning mixture

1/2 cheese mixture

lettuce, tomatoes, onions (whatever else ya want)

Rest of the cheese mixture on top

Bake at 350 for 15 minutes. 

Enjoy!!

Sometimes Mom Duties Take Priority

I know many of you have probably been DYING to know how I did in the race on St. Patty's Day....and I'm sad to let you know...I didn't do it.

 

I ended up having to put my wants behind where Miss H needed to be that day and so I skipped out.  Which I'll be honest...wasn't all that bad considering it was a chilly 34 degrees and breezy out! 

 

But I did get my tshirt from that day (whole point of paying for a race anyways right??  Can I get an AMEN??) 

 

*crickets*

 

hello??

 

Anyone there??

 

Moving on! 

 

I'm getting back at it though.  Trying to get my eating under control again and drinking my weight in water each day.  This weekend its supposed to be in the 40s...so I'm going to get back out there and start up again. 

 

Love this little girl!

 

 

 

First "Race" of 2013..kinda

Anyone else running in a St. Patty's Day Race? 

I'm "running" a 4 miler but there ain't gonna be no racin' going on around here for me! 

After yesterday's trial run...I'll be surprised if I can run 3 miles without walking. 

I fully plan on walking some of it (and drinking green beer at the same time) and supporting my fellow runners as I eat drink their green beer their dust. 

My co-worker talked me into doing and I'm now regretting it and throwing office supplies at him during all working hours because I know I'm not going to do well but Whatev right?? 

It's the start of the running season and there's FREE GREEN BEER afterwards....and of course

I get a tshirt for participating. 

It's ALL about the tshirt..duh! And the green beer...

They didn't say how much you gotta participate...but I'll be participating in some shape that day.

Does picking up my registration packet = participating?? 

One thing this "race" will do is kick my butt back in gear and get me back out there again. 

Should be fun....with all that green beer. 



Weekend Recap....I'm back at it and SORE!

This weekend was relaxing and crazy busy too at the same time.  Come Friday afternoon I was D.O.N.E with the week! 

After sporting this cute scarf all day

LOVE infinity scarfs right now and I FINALLY found one I love (NY and CO)

 I enjoyed a couple of these after I got home for the day while I made dinner and cleaned my house.  I rarely drink just because so when you see me doing this...you know it's been a LONG week!

Saturday I spent the entire day cleaning more and making food for family to come over for Miss H's birthday party.  It was a great time but just crazy I tell ya.  That kind of fun is exhausting! 

Fruit Pizza Idea I found on Pinterest...pretty close to the actual one I must say!!



Pretty good right??



All the yummy food I made.  No complaining from any of the guests how good everything was!

All ready for the party!

Love this sweater!!  I need 5 more like it

Ice Cream cake from the DQ

Cousins!  Seeing these 3 together warms my heart in ways I never thought possible

Then Sunday morning Miss H was dropped off at religion class at 9am and it was a nice day out and I decided I needed to get my butt out there and run again. 

It was in the 50s when I woke up...so perfect weather to head out in. 

I'll be honest...I've been scared of seeing how much I've lost what I worked so hard to do this past year in the couple of months I've taken off from running.  I knew it was gonna be bad and I knew my mind was gonna tell me I couldn't do it.  I headed out and did .7 miles and I was huffing and puffing like the big bad wolf in the Three Little Pigs story. 

I got to a stop light and couldn't believe how much my lungs hurt.  My legs were out of shape you could tell but OMG my lungs...where did they go??? 

I haven't had to concentrate this hard on keeping my breathing under control in so long....IT SUCKED!! 

I walked some and stretched on my legs and feet good...they were hurting and I could feel myself starting to limp.  The LAST thing I want is to get hurt again.  I gotta take better care of my feet and make sure I stretch out.  Got to another light and I started running again....felt a little better but it was still rough and then of course I hit a hill.  ERRR!

I made myself get to the top of the hill before I stop, caught my breathe again and started up again, run another long stretch and then walk again.  Started running again and FINALLY felt good and finished out the last half mile or so strong and ran the rest of the way.  I was tired and exhausted and couldn't believe how much that 2.7 miles sucked. 

It took me 35 miles to do that 2.7 miles.  yes I walked some so it would  have been faster if I ran...but I ran 5 miles in 55 minutes on Thanksgiving day...not cool!

I was mad at myself that I didn't keep up with my running but then I know it's really not been possible with it being cold out.  80% of my running has always taken place with Miss H out with me and I can't drag my kid out in the cold to run a couple of miles...I'm not THAT mean!  So it is what it is...I'm running further than I was a year ago at this time so I'll take it. 

Walking around my church parking lot and just stretching it out and reflecting on everything going on in my life I spotted an outdoor rosary area and the stations of the cross and I walked through them all and prayed the rosary in this area while I waited for Miss H to get out of class. 

Outdoor Rosary

It was one of the more peaceful things I have done in a long time.  The wind was blowing, the sun was shining through the branches and it was just me out there.  And it reminded me that sometimes in life things get crazy and busy and overwhelming and they don't always go the way we thought they would...but no matter what the basics of our life are always there. 

My faith is a true basic in my life.  I can't remember the last time I prayed the rosary but doing so felt very healing with everything I've been going through these last couple of months.  It reminded that I don't run for races or fast times...I run for me.  I run for that peaceful feeling I get being out on my own, just my thoughts and my feet on the ground. 

This morning I woke up crazy sore but I'm glad to be back at it. 

Bring on the Spring Running Season!